Death of a Unicorn – REVIEW & COCKTAIL – The Martini Shot

It feels like in the past few years, we’ve gotten a surge of what I would call “eat the rich” cinema. Movies that lampoon and often reflect the attitudes and actions of the world’s most wealthy. You know the ones: The Menu, Knives Out, Triangle of Sadness, and plenty, plenty more. Since the days of jesters poking fun at their king, we have always as a species gravitated towards taking down those with more money than they know what to do with. Is it because of bitter jealousy or an internalized anger at an imperfect system? Depends on who you ask and how much they may have had to drink. But my point is that there are a lot of these movies, so you may start to see a good amount of overlap and repetition. So at this point, you’re gonna need to have quite the hook to get my attention…or should I say, horn?

Death of a Unicorn takes those aforementioned themes of uber-wealthy insanity and gives a sparkly and bloody paint job with the injection of one fantastical horse creature. It definitely makes for one of the most out there additions to this subgenre, though that may be in concept alone. There isn’t a ton of originality to the points the film targets, which is honestly okay when the film is more concerned with being over the top than sincere. Yet there are moments of sentimentality that really drag this thing down, not really meshing with the goofiness the film tends to lean into. It finds itself smack dab in the middle of two attitudes vying for control, but when it’s willing to let the entrails fly, it becomes a bit more of a magical experience.

The film follows estranged father/daughter duo Elliot and Ridley, who are spending the weekend at the remote estate of Elliot’s wealthy but dying boss, Odell Leopold. But their journey hits a roadblock, or more specifically, a unicorn, killing it and then proceeding to stuff it in their trunk. The dead creature first appears to be a blessing in disguise, as its blood sports healing properties that the wealthy Leopold family can’t wait to exploit. But this is far from the last unicorn, and its much bigger, meaner parents are ready to rip and tear through anyone they set their sights on.

I can only hope that Jenna Ortega is cool with playing so many moody teenagers, because that seems to be all she’s ever really cast as. Sure, she plays those roles well and believably, but it has made me less and less excited to see some of her appearances as of late because they’ve all started to feel a little samey. In this, she plays the sole voice of reason, trying to plead with her wealthy hosts and her pushover dad to not disturb the balance of unnatural nature they’ve discovered. Luckily the angst is rolled back quite a bit so she doesn’t feel too much like a caricature of what you’d expect, but I do wish we could have gotten a bit more personality out of this character. There’s moments where Ortega has some pretty solid comedic timing, but she’s not really the ones given ample moments to be funny throughout. She’s the straight man that no one will listen to, but this still could’ve been a great opportunity to see more from Ortega in a way we haven’t seen yet.

And if you love Paul Rudd, well, you may very well hate him here. This is perhaps the most unlikable Rudd performance I’ve seen, which could be a good or bad thing. All of the goofy charm he’s normally known for is more or less stripped away, turning him into a truly pathetic yes man that constantly ignores the concerns of his daughter. He’s incredibly frustrating, but there’s at least payoff to the character growing and realizing the error of his ways. He thinks he’s doing the right thing, but if he would actually try to connect with his daughter, he’d probably find the right thing to be easier than he’s making it.

The rest of the film is scattered with some pretty good character performances. Will Poulter more or less steals the show as the douchey trust fund kid Shepard, delivering some of the best lines and and grade-A facial expressions. Tea Leoni and Richard E. Grant plays the stereotypical but enjoyable billionaire couple that show how much they care by putting their money towards things like rescuing or vaccinating refugees (they’re not entirely sure which). And then there’s minor roles from Anthony Carrigan and Sunita Mani as common workers who get caught in the crossfire of the Leopolds’ greed. A lot of these performances are quite hammy, but in a good way. You won’t find many surprises or insights into these tried and true character archetypes, but they never annoy you with their antics.

But what about those titular unicorns? Quite the unusual horror movie monster aside from that one bit in The Cabin in the Woods. Truthfully, I’m a bit mixed on their presentation. On one hand, I think they provide for some unique kills and setups while also showcasing some pretty solid animatronic work. But unfortunately, the majority of the time you see them, they’re CGI beasts that don’t exactly look the best. Most of the time they’re covered by night, which does help, but once it’s bright and sunny outside, the fakeness becomes painfully apparent. Still, there’s some fun to be had when they start to wreak havoc on those elites, it’s just a shame it takes until the third act for things to really get disgusting and gory.

While I think the odd funny line or nutty kill helped keep this from being completely boring, there still seems to be a hesitance to go as crazy as the plot would allow it. The film opens up with a great, insane mercy killing of a unicorn, but that’s about as wild as it gets for the next hour or so. The plot and themes are so obvious and generic that it kind of needed that extra bit of zaniness to make those bits more forgivable, especially for how long the film makes you sit with them. The comedy is unfortunately just not strong enough to completely justify its surface level critiques on capitalism and the apathy that wealth brings. Additionally, the sentimentality between the daughter and dad here just feels super forced, being way too sentimental for what should be a crazy film about unicorns skewering people. This is especially apparent in the third act, where moments of tension and action are awkwardly broken up to try to stuff in some last minute character development. Maybe this would have been a little bit more palatable if the film leaned more into the cosmic pondering of life after death, but like the rest of the film’s ideas, it only hits the surface level.

While I had a decent enough time with Death of Unicorn, I couldn’t help but feel frustrated by the film’s decision to play it relatively safe and not getting as weird or kooky as a setup like this would allow. The silliness does hit at times and the uni-kills can sometimes be shockingly gross, but the hesitance to push the film father left me wanting more from this idea. It’s a shame that good class warfare films may be becoming much like the fantasy creature at the forefront of this film; nothing more than a legend of what once was.

RATING

UNICORN BLOOD

Unicorns blood is not only sought after by dark lords in cursed woods, but also the uber wealthy, as it can do everything from clear up your skin to cure cancer. While this cocktail can’t do any of that (I’m working on it), it can still give you a magical experience with each sip. The combination of the sweet vanilla and floral elderflower create a bright, tantalizing drinking experience, while a little bit of purple glitter dust helps to give the drink a fantastical touch.

INGREDIENTS

• 2oz vanilla vodka
• 1oz elderflower liqueur
• 3/4oz lemon juice
• 1/2oz honey
• Pinch of edible purple luster dust
• Garnish: Lemon peel

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Add ingredients to a shaker and shake with ice.
2. Strain into a cocktail glass (the more pretentious the better).
3. Garnish with unicorn horn shaped lemon peel.